" I don't know " . I don't know why do i say this three word sentence to myself almost 100 times everyday . I seriously do not know . I would have said it at least 5 times by now from the time i started writing this post . I warn u here that this cud be really boring , because i dont intend to conclude anything at the end of this pretty much a very long post , its all random thoughts that comes to me and haunts me , poorly structured and the flow of which would be miserable making no sense , and finding many lines bakwaas . So if u go ahead its all on ur own risk and for doing that i give u all the right to leave the worst of comments u feel .
I dont know if i am the most confused person in this world . I am confused about right and wrong , good and bad , happiness and sadness , the union of which pretty much covers everything in this universe . I find myself stuck in a vicious circle of daily life funda . I very often question myself some time who am i or what is the purpose of my existence . I could only hurt myself which makes me totally harmless for others . I dont know why i realise my weaknesses everyday . Why do i have to think every day lets not give up .. lets keep trying ... why i do not always remain happy ... why is there dominance of sadness over happiness .. why do i say myself ...nothing is going to be better and then i say again ...lets not give up..keep trying ... i dont know the answers to all these question and dont even know do i really need to know the answers . I fear the most "fear" itself . I always wish god to take this away from me forever , but it somehow always finds a place within me . I do not want to feel its presence . I am not sure how i am presenting myself by writing these thoughts - a pessimist . I dont know . But do i really need to care of that . I always find / create a new funda to stay up confident when the old one stops working . But why do i do that . Why do i always need a one . I dont know .
I dont know why do not i always know what i want . I dont know why do i wish everyday in the morning that my day go good . Why do i wish that .... why i am afraid of anything bad to take... i hate all this ... why am i not always the same guy actually i am .... or may be i myself do not know who actually i am . I dont know why i am bothered so much ...my friends tell me that i overthink things ...... which probably u wud have made out by now and if u r still reading it . I thought for once to make my first post very much interesting / well structured . But then i thought why it cant be just putting the thoughts in a random fashion for which the blogs are . And what if after reading this post , people start looking at me like a less confident , low guy . Do i really need to bother about all this . How will i get affected by this , will my work be affected or will i lose my friends . I dont know . I really appreciate and thank you at the same time if u r reading this line of my post , because i hardly expect anyone to come till here , but i would have , if i were u because i love this kind of stuff - life kinda .
I dont know why this random thoughts keep coming to my one and only brain and neither do i know the answers to all these question nor do i know a way to stop this questions on the way before they reach my brain . I felt like throwing a PJ here , but kept it to me , thinking that u might not be able to get it and even if u get it you would think i am not good at jokes . I do not want u to think this .
I dont know if this is the most boring post u wud have ever read , but why do i bother , is this my problem . While writing this , i am bothered about how do i give a good ending to this post : but what is the need for a good end . Cant i just stop anywhere and say this is the end . Why are all these things so important . Having said that i say to u : this is the end , and if u are still reading this , this wud be pretty much a good news for u i guess . And please do not curse me for this because i never promised to keep it interesting and u only chose to come till here after i have warned u in the first para itself . I dont know do i really need to say it again : this is the end .
7 comments:
Nice Post Rocky_the_Coder.
You have put down the things which most of us think(atleast I do) into words. Dont worry, you are not the only one. I think everyone experiences this(to different extents though).
The reasoning I think as why this happens is : There is no perfect solution for anything. You will come up with some answer to your questions, later you find out its not good enough, you go to the next better solution and this process will keep repeating for ever(unless you reach perfection which is very very rare). This will keep happening again and again and the only thing we can do is to endure and possibly learn to enjoy this process and keep becoming better and better.
All the best.
On the first look it didn't seem to be Raka's blog at all. But then while going through it as i came across many things which indicated true feelings of Rakesh. Perfectly written buddy!!!
"I don't know" why i read this blog."I don't know" what to say about this blog."I don't know" whether i liked this blog or not."I don't know" what rocky meant in this blog.
But yes one thing "I know" after reading this blog is that rocky knows English.
Now I know where does the chunk of time Rocky spends @ home, wandering aimlessly scaring all his roomies, go into. It all reflects how much he introspects and what an enigma he has been, to himself and us as well.I must admit, it was a bit boring going on till the end of this blog:(..
The intricate persona which we believed Rocky dwelt with in the college hostel seems to be demystified when we go through this blog.One would always find him pondering over his thoughts with immense dedication,not to mention the weirdest of timings he chooses to do this.Now we know how he has been coping up with his perplexed perception of the life with such a stoic face..!!! Rocky,its been a great endeavour ,but there are certainly a number of areas for improvement..Keep trying..Good work as of now...
" Yar Rakesh Aggarwaal " heee itna pakau Blogger ho sakta hai .......
Hey bhagwan...isko v nahi choooda..
Thumbs Down !!!111
Mixture of everything actually and pretty well formatted. Try to make the next one simpler and more focused on one thought. The good way to blog about something is to write what you feel. The good way to present a blog is to get a thought, keep writing till you are exhausted, when you are finished, get it reviewed or sit back, take a snack, come and read it again. If you are satisfied then publish it. What you wrote is a good collection of thoughts. But lets be frank. You did not know what you were writing about in particular, and the reader wont be able to interpret your line of thought. Although he will be able to grasp your exhaustive vocabulary, and your good skill of writing in plain and simple language.
What beats me is that why is it that even after so many comments a second blog entry has not been rolled out. I guess its time to improve on your blogging genius. Its a good head start. Lets hope you keep it that way. And try to share something fun as well. I'm sure many people would like to explore a fun side of you.
Sorry if this is too long or philosophical, but that's exactly what I intended this to be. A comment on your writing. Sorry it sounds rude. But good job :)
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